I was trying to find some conkers the other
day. I managed two which I fear is
scarcely sufficient for my purpose.
And that would be? Keeping out spiders. A correspondent to The Guardian had stated
firmly that conkers keep spiders away and as we are entering the spider season
and given that spiders and me have a complicated relationship (faults on both
sides I’m sure, but I’d just as rather not have them in the flat) this seemed
like a plan, albeit one unlikely to work.
But a low level arachnophobe like myself has to try what he can.
In the meantime I have spreading the
word. A till driver at Tesco who was
fretting that there had been a spider in her car while she was driving to work
and would still be there when her shift ended, was very taken with the idea and
vowed there and then to fill her car with the nuts as soon as. I just hope they don’t all roll under the
brake pedal, though that would make for an entertaining inquest.
Meanwhile the female half of the couple in
the ground floor flat (the male half was once bitten by a moth as long time
readers of this blog may recall) was also fascinated by the idea and has asked
me to report on whether it works which strikes me as tricky as I will have to
show the absence of spiders. A bit like
the old joke about the chap who carries an anti-tiger charm in Scotland
But my researches may come to naught as I
am finding it hard to find any, as stated above. I have put out a plea on facebook, the modern
equivalent of chaining yourself to the railings outside the Houses of
Parliament and will keep looking.
Wish me luck.
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